For each and every one of us, life is a wild card. Reality doesn’t care about our expectations and plans, yet we consistently cling to them – then find ourselves stuck, frustrated, and demoralized when actual outcomes don’t match our preconceived ideas.
Somewhere inside, we know this already. We know that creative acts are about bringing something new into the world, but the discomfort of the unknown (fueled by our assumptions and concepts) keeps us stuck.
We don’t know how to create what we want because it’s different than what we know, and because of the wild cards of life, we can’t be sure that we have the answers. This desire to know is the problem. The need to fit reality into the tidy boxes of our concepts and assumptions prevents us from moving forward into the unknown – the place where true creations are born.
So, how do we get unstuck?
First, we need to accept reality (with all of its unpredictability) exactly as it is – including ourselves, our thought patterns, the outcomes of our efforts, external factors, and everything else.
Combine what you know and what you want – then take a mental step back to become an impartial observer. This is structural tension at work. Learning happens by moving toward a desired outcome, even when it isn’t fully clear.
We build concepts based on previous experiences, but those concepts can either help or hinder. Noticing when we’re acting from a place of already-held concepts allows us to see which are working for us, and which are working against us.
Clinging to the data points we’ve collected from the past is perhaps the biggest source of impedance, but by reflecting on what thought patterns move us forward, and which keep us in place, we can begin to discard the automatic patterns of thought that close us off from future possibilities.
Your mind WILL give you guidance if you suspend your automatic mind stuff, using your mind to see through itself and perceive reality as it really is. Instead of seeing each event or experience as an isolated incident, you can zoom out to see the patterns that create your life – from patterns of interaction to patterns of thought – and then reality itself becomes your teacher.
You can flip obstacles into advantages and educational moments. The things that are making you stuck are the areas that deserve your attention. By observing from a place of stillness, paying attention to the patterns and assumptions at play, you gain the peripheral vision – the wider perspective – to see that they’re no longer serving you.
This distancing, this way of taking an outside view of your thoughts, habits, and patterns, allows you to use the ups and downs of life as a teacher. It’s not holding you in place, it’s propelling you forward. Life is in the business of creating life, and allowing space for mystery, unpredictability, and newness can be a springboard for your creative ambitions.
We need to get ahold of our attention, learn to reflect, and be willing to experiment free from expectation and premeditated disappointment. You can take action, then reflect on whether or not it’s moving you in the right direction. Then do it again and again, free from judgment, and see the patterns that emerge.
Some of this stuckness comes from impatience too. We want the results right now. We want to yank the thread and get to the end result instead of following it with curiosity… Instead of exploring the process and letting the wilderness of reality guide us to unexpected places. As you move through it, it becomes your current reality. Learning becomes an iterative process that constantly moves you forward in incremental steps, including those that don’t work as intended.
Remember that in presence and observation, you’re allowed to change your mind! Part of embracing a sense of ongoing discovery is taking the time to reflect on things as they are right now. Is it serving you? Is it moving you closer to desired outcomes? Is it taking you in a new direction? You can ask yourself these questions, observe the answers with impartiality, and make new decisions based on the truth of the present.
Find the potential in each moment. When you escape the patterns of preconception and prediction, accepting reality as it truly is, the stuckness melts away.
Learn the path by walking. The obstacles along the way are as much a part of the process as the successes.
In fact, they’re often opportunities in disguise – if only you’re willing to adjust your vision.
